Gravity tester: Have you ever sat in a high chair when your mommy or daddy puts lots of bang-y toys on your tray? After you bang and swing them around on your chair, you can let go and they fall on the tile floor! You should try it. This is one of my favorite activities. I hope Vassar offers this as a bachelor’s degree.
Paper tear-er: Best place to practice this is in Dr. Phillip’s office. She has this big long vinyl table that is covered with a long strip of tissue paper. Oh boy. When you sit on it, it crinkles. All you gotta do is scrape your fingers over the edge and it tears. Then you wad it up and put it in your mouth so Daddy can then scoop out slobbery balls of paper from under your tongue and out of the sides of your cheeks. Georgia Tech, maybe?
Washcloth sucker: Three words: bath time rocks. Why? Because you get a soppy wet soapy washcloth, stick it in your mouth and suck on it. Calgon, take me away. University of Hawaii for sure.
Hair puller: I’m a big fan of hair that can be pulled. If people hair is not around, Spanky Mae’s fur will do in a pinch. Beauty school, here I come.
Necklace/earring inspector: Every girl likes a little bling, right? All the better if you can pull it off your mommy’s neck or try ripping it from her ears. I’m thinking of checking out some schools in upstate New York for this.
Spoon chewer: Now that I got two teeth, this is even more fun than ever. Mommy fills the spoon with cereal or sweet potatoes, then puts it in my mouth. I bite the spoon so she can’t get it all the way in, and then food smears all over my “Night Shift” bib. I’ll probably have to look into culinary school if I go this route.
Wrestler: I enjoy sitting on the floor, facing Curious Jorge, and face planting straight into him. I also enjoy doing this with my great big Taggies ball. It’s great fun smushing your face into soft toys. I’ve also started doing this to other babies at daycare. Miguel gets a big laugh out of it. Maybe WWF will have some openings when I get a little older.
Alarm clock: My morning songs are much more pleasant to wake up to than a stupid buzzing alarm clock. Every time Mommy comes into my room in the morning—oh, usually about 6:15 a.m., Saturdays and Sundays included—I am practicing all my syllables. My vowel noises. My consonants, etc. Mommy says she can hear me in the baby monitor that sits on her nightstand. Vanderbilt? I hear their voice program is tops.
1 comment:
Funny. Sorry I missed you guys at Tate's bday party...we had a school carnival to run. Pieface seems to have a lot going for her. That's great. I think Margaret will be some sort of professional "reader" as that's all she likes to do. I don't think that's a competitive job market, unfortunately. I'll have to teach her about "supplemental incomes."
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